#2 SEX!!!!

Sexual discussion of polyamory lands somewhere between assuming bisexuals are promiscuous and asking a transperson what their genitals look like: If you’re not fucking them, then it’s none of your fucking business! But, hey, since the question’s out there, let’s talk about it. Fuck it.

“Do you put boundaries on what you can do with whom?”

That’s unique to every construct and group (and none of your business if you aren’t involved in that group). Closed relationships can be extremely limited: don’t do anything with anyone else. Fluid bonded relationships trust everyone to use barriers with partners outside the fluid bond, and will be discussed more in two weeks when I answer the question about STDs/STIs. Some open relationships that only allow tertiary relationships may not allow cuddling, as this may deter emotional bonding. Other open relationships may restrict certain sex acts, such as penile-vaginal, penile-anal, or whatever parallel construct can be drawn by lesbians to those male-normative acts. In BDSM relationships, partners may not be allowed to engage in the BDSM acts they have grown to enjoy with their primary partner(s), or may specifically be looking for non-sexual BDSM fulfillment outside of their vanilla partner. Also contrary to popular belief, BDSM and sex are not one and the same.