#6 How to Come Out as Poly

Coming Out stories seem to be a right of passage, or an entrance ticket, into many queer social groups. Not all Coming Out has to be done as an extensive drama, though! But, sometimes, it can’t be avoided. Whether coming out to family, friends, strangers, coworkers, or the internet community, always consider your options and strategies. Coming Out in Public Settings If you’re in committed nonmonogamous relationships, more often than not you’ll find that your partners have become such integral parts of your everyday life that you end up telling stories about all of them. If you refer to them with the same term of endearment (partner, bf/gf), you may have your coworkers, group members, or munch-mates believing your single, solitary partner leads an endlessly exciting and sometimes contradictory life. Sometimes, however, things happen that involve multiple partners at the same time… and the best tactic is to just tell the story like it’s entirely normal and let questions come from anyone who actually picks up on, let alone cares, that you have more than one intimate romantic/life partner. As with the DITF example, you’ll already have set a tone with whatever story you told, and the overall tone of the gathering will prevail over any misguided desires to “make a scene.” (Unless they’re the token misanthrope who doesn’t quite get social etiquette anyway, but in that case they’re easy enough to push aside as a group, usually.)